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  • I'd Tap That
    $6.99
  • I AM CURRENTLY UNSUPERVISED. I KNOW, IT FREAKS ME OUT TOO. BUT THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS!
    $6.99
  • Chick Magnet
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  • My Bucket List: 1. Beer 2. Ice
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  • Money Talks... But all mine ever says is goodbye. Funny
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  • May the course be with you - Golf
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  • I love you like zombies love brains. Funny
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  • Don't worry. Zombies eat brains, so you're safe. Funny Zombie
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  • Cats - Because people suck - funny cat
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  • Chihuahua in pocket - pocket pet
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  • COMMON SENSE IS SO RARE THESE DAYS, IT SHOULD BE CLASSIFIED AS A SUPER POWER
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  • I not not hit you. I high fived your face.
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  • Not my circus not my monkeys - Funny
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  • One lab accident away from being a supervillian
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  • I pooped today - funny poop
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  • Can't We All Just Get Along
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  • Canada Where Grandma Buys Her Drugs
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  • Brb Boomerang Funny
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  • I'm only responsible for what I say not for what you understand - sarcastic
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  • My brain has too many tabs open - funny
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  • I'm with stupid - Funny
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  • I had a super busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide - sarcastic
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  • FREE HUGS - Funny
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  • 0 days without sarcasm - funny sarcastic
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  • D20 Orc Pushed Critical Fail Dungeons and Dragons
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  • Day Drunk - Funny Drinking
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  • DILF - Devoted Involved Loving Father - Fathers Day Funny
    $6.99
  • I may be wrong but it's highly unlikely - funny sarcastic
    $6.99
  • I Put The Lit In Literature Funny Shakespeare
    $6.99
  • If I'm ever on life support unplug me and plug me me back in see if that works - funny
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  • I'm an engineer I'm good with math - Funny Engineer
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  • I'm so old I remember when #hashtags were called pound signs - funny
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  • I'm With Stupid New Twist On Classic Funny
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  • I'm Working On a New Recipe
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  • In My Defense I Was Left Unsupervised
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  • Its Hard To Explain Puns to Kleptomaniacs
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  • I make beer disappear - what's your superpower? Funny Beer
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  • I love sleeping it's like being dead without the commitment - funny sarcastic
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  • I love my awesome wife - wife
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  • Forget lab safety I want super powers - funny science
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  • Grammar The Difference Between Knowing Your Shit And...
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  • Heavy Metals - Funny chemistry periodic table elements
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  • Holy crap Doug is that you? Funny chicken egg
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  • I am not an expert but I have watched a lot of youtube videos - funny
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  • I Don't Have a Short Temper, I Have a Quick Reaction To Bullshit
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  • I do yoga to relieve stress Just Kidding, I drink wine in yoga pants - funny yoga. wine
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  • I have a pretty daughter. I also have a gun, a shovel, and an alibi - funny father daughter
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  • I have the body of a god - funny fat guy
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  • Don't be mad cause i'm a little cooler
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  • I Believe - Santa
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  • The Alphabet Elemenopee
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  • You're Killing Me Smalls - Sandlot
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  • You People Must Be Exhausted From Watching Me Do Everything
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  • You don't gnome me!
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  • You Ain't Gettin Nun
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  • WINNING IN THE FIGHT AGAINST ANOREXIA
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  • Why You Delete Cookies? Cookie Monster
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  • Why Not Zoidberg? Futurama
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  • Who Let Me Adult? I Can't Adult.
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  • Who gives a split. Funny Bowling
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  • When someone yells stop, I don't know if it's in the name of love, it's hammer time, or if I should collaborate and listen. Funny
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  • When I Said How Stupid Could You Be...
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  • You're my butter half pun
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  • You Rock! You Rule! Pun
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  • You Serious Clark
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  • One Night Stand
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  • I Have a Beautiful Daughter... And a Gun!
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  • I Have Sex Daily... I Mean Dyslexia! Fcuk!
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  • I Hate Tacos, Said No Juan Ever
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  • Nothing Makes a Person More Productive Than The Last Minute
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  • I'm Sorry for What I Said When I Was Hungry
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  • Medicated - For Your Protection
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  • I Put The Pro In Procrastination
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  • Best Friends - Cookies and Milk Funny
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  • I'm Not Saying I'm Wonder Woman. I'm Just Saying That No One Has Ever Seen Me And Wonder Woman In A Room Together.
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  • You want a piece of me? Cake
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  • What do you call an alligator in a vest? An Investigator. Pun
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  • We Give a Hoot - Funny Owl
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  • Stop! You're under a rest! Pun
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  • Spelling Is Dificult... - Funny
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  • Sometimes I Use Words I Don't Understand To Sound Hypothesis
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  • Sometimes Autocorrect Really Passes Me Off
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  • Some People Just Need a Pat On The Back
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  • Some People Just Need a High Five.  In The Face. With A Chair
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  • Some people are like a slinky... Funny
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  • Single Taken I Get About As Much Attention As a White Crayon.
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  • Silence Is Golden Duct Tape Is Silver
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  • Sex Tape
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  • Seals are just dog mermaids
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  • Tacocat spelled backwards is Tacocat
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  • The Ass Family - Wise, Smart, Lazy, Kiss, Dumb - Funny
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  • The Boobs Are Real, The Smile Is Fake
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  • Under New Management. Retired.
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  • Tonight's Forecast 99% Chance of Wine.
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  • To Do List: Your Mom, Your Sister
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  • Titanic Swim Team
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  • Thug life? Drop the T and get over here.
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  • This Is Not Zelda
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  • This Is My Favorite Tea - Funny Pun
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  • This Is How I Cut Carbs Pizza
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  • Think outside the box - Funny
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  • There's no angry way to say bubbles
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  • There is magic in the air and it's called WiFi.
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  • Ride It Like You Stole It
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  • I'm Not An Alcoholic, I'm A Drunk
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  • One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duct tape to make them stop.
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  • Always Be Yourself. Unless You Can Be A Unicorn. Then Always Be A Unicorn.
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  • Let's Get Weird
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  • Today Is My Hot Mess Day
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  • Dear Algebra...
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  • Science!
    $6.99
  • Plan Ahead Funny
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  • Go F#ck Your #Selfie
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  • Resistance Is Futile
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  • Don't Steal.  The Government Hates Competition
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  • Zombies Eat Brains.  So You Should Be Fine Funny Zombie
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  • Sometimes I wake up grumpy, other times I let her sleep.
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  • I'm Not Insane, My Mother Had Me Tested
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  • I'm In Shape - Round Is A Shape Funny
    $6.99
  • My Liver Is Evil And Needs To Be Punished - Funny Drinking
    $6.99
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